"The Year The Flower Explodes"
I
So shall this be the year the flower explodes
And scatters her petals in sacrifice
To herald the time of the dream that heaves the
heart
And spirals so swiftly upwards from whirly depths
To meet soft-hued eyes that surrender, never fading
To spark the flow of sweet nauseau mercy milk
Rekindle the sprinkled leaves of wintergreen
And revive the silver mystery of frost?
II
Such was the sway of ensnaring illusion
Set in play when her face I seized
And all in a flash I saw it floating:
Petals of the bloody, effusive rose
Spreading for the sun
Desire's unblemished complement
Outward radiating, to me or so it seemed
And so in the auditoreum the poetry reading droned
on
The cascade of honeyed words blurred
Though to her, girl veiled in mystery, I could
speak none
Down that path to limbo went our chimerical meetings
Where words would tumble
And spill into conversations, hot mazes
That lead to mysteries opening, like petalled
fingers
That tip-toe toward that secret spot
Where time stands still
And the laudatory egg of bliss
Too eruptive to bear
Engulfs us
And we drift in aftermath
Toward the yearning depths of the swishy sea
III
Careening rip-roar of the blue-tinged sea
Where amoebas spin round and round in halo'd light
And the whoosh of akashic breath
Brought from realms above by the cognate angels
Toss me through time, a traveler, to dance the
primal dawn
Though in the dying rays of the empty theater
called today
I can only fail to trace the lineations of my
fine desire
And no effort of imagination can move the halcyon
wave
Let go of the pendulum, strange sailor!
And let God let it come in all due time
IV
Electric green light pours from the lighthouse
of the mind
And I see the silhouettes appear on the water's
horizon
Like the glass-blown heat of a mirage
An image, a faraway apparition of nuclear sentinels
so keen
To surge and streak and wreak havoc
Bringing the ash of apocalypse to bear
With time so short, and the night so very long
and langorous
Won't you traipse with me through the fields of
Avalon?
We might stumble perhaps on pink meadows in repose
And let the sharp stark tablets that record our
past
Sink low into the murk and muck of everglades
And Hades will not know which way we turn
Why wait to find that in death all ends are known?
V
Oh to dream, to pass through a liquid dimension
And to visualize your doppelganger, quicksilvery
form
Materializing to hot breath, breathing flesh
To just pluck my slip-shod daydreams from their
web
And smolder right through the seething vale
To greet this steamy place of concrete streets
Where the hermit has hid, he's hankered in silent
retreat
In a cold place, the place where silence seeps
Or will love come like snow that falls in the
desert
Appearing suddenly, then gone, melted by the rising
sun?
Will I be the arcane passerby who never dives
Into the bubbling fountain of your soul?
All the while the strangled ghosts of hometown
nights
Spin round and round in roadside effigies to my
ire
And we are no more to wonder:
"Oblivion, is that what the messenger came to
claim?"
And then, beneath the stationary moon
How long will I wait
For the sounds of celestial music to spur me on?
There in the hazel light of the never known
You will be the one born from the dark ash
Who goes through life glowing like gold
(Tucson, circa 1993)
Vocabulary
Akashic:
From Akasha, Sanskrit term for space or "ether," the primordial
substance from which the four elements of antiquity
(fire, water, air, and
earth) are derived.
Halcyon:
1) "A bird identified with the kingfisher and held in ancient legends
to nest at sea about the time of the winter solstice
and to calm the waves
during incubation 2) calm, peaceful."
Doppelganger:
"A spiritual or ghostly double or counterpart, esp. an
apparitional double of a living person."
( Latter two definitions from Webster's New
Collegiate Dictionary, 1988 edition)
"Reflections: On Writing"
The moment remembered, rehashed in the mind
Becomes a key
To the free flow of artifice
The moment lodged in the mind
Gets made into a linguistic hieroglyph
And the reality of events that slip and shift
Becomes something more than it was
And something less
(fall 1991, Benson, Arizona)
"Conjecture
on the Night"
The night runs deeper,
Deeper than negligee falling may fathom
Consider the way
Black eye-liner lingers
Just until dawn usurps
With her rosy-petalled fingers
The sting of forgetful wine
Brings an unconscious litany of snowflakes...
Melting, just wishing I had
Ah, the power to streak your face
While the night's as inbred and woven
As all your father's chosen habitudes
And the rude, unseemly
Unmelting moon
Sloughs behind a symbolic dark cloud
Aloud, the silence of phasing stars
Unamazing for their vibrant discharge
Of rings in apparitional white
The night means black.
(Boston University, winter 1989 - 1990)
"Apres"
Hey there, O Mr. Director above
(from
your omniscient angles unseen)
Was it you who did the deeds that're done
And determined the denoument
Of the wee and woeful human strain?
Under those blazing lightbeams
We'll all, inevitably, have to be
Face to face
With the why behind a why
Behind
the mask, penultimate, in vain
Flying unfettered toward the cosmic scribble
Strewn across the face of the vast
Circling
Shining
Shimmering
Smiling
Soul
(Home
found within, at last,
not far away, not dreams)
And he so sly, here
Lighting, puffing his cigarette
Blowing smoke rings which swirl upwards and disappear
(1st version at Boston
University circa 1989 - 1990; revised Tucson,
2000)
"The milk-rich
flow of memories"
The milk-rich flow of memories
Can be recovered like peeling an artichoke
Layer by layer
Until you find yourself, a tiny child
In back of a pick-up truck rolling with grown-ups
Rumbling down the road
Then the mattress suddenly flies off
And tumbles away, spinning down the street
Doing crazy cartwheels off into infinity
(Boston University, circa 1989)
"Fear"
Pillow-hiding from the red-eyed wolf
Who paddles slowly by
Row, row, rowing his wooden boat
Billows of smoke curl from his eyes
Icicles lit by flames surreal
Drip, drop like funereal tears
My eyes in frozen horror stare
Through the open window, cob-webbed no more
(Boston University, circa 1989)
"Summer haiku:
Boston 1990"
Footprints in the sand,
Seaweed in a swirl of waves
"At Revere Beach"
Beach uncomely, riddled with waste
Like a hit of crack, you start and it's so hard
To stop, so easy since everybody else is
Equally implicated, just one more fritter
a paper bag
a piece of crab (but that's nature's litter)
a plastic straw
a shovel and pail through with a day's castle ephemera
soda cans (pollute the sands)
and a cruddy litany of etc.'s
Negate anyone's responsibilities
So it seems, as the waves keep doing their thing
And the seagulls dip down low
Sure never to touch or come down too near
The sunbathers
Undaunted as a spectre
Amid the fruitflies of the damned
(Boston, summer 1990)